“The Mania Made Me.”
Jenifer Lewis is not just a celebrated actress but also a fierce advocate for mental health awareness. Her candidness about living with bipolar disorder reveals a side of the condition that many people tend to overlook: the complexity and duality of experience it brings. While bipolar disorder is often stigmatized, Lewis highlights how her life and career have been shaped, for better or worse, by the condition.
Diagnosed in 1990, Lewis has spent more than three decades grappling with the realities of bipolar disorder. Her 2017 memoir, The Mother of Black Hollywood, chronicles not only her Hollywood journey but also the rollercoaster of emotions that come with the diagnosis. In her discussions, including a candid interview with The Root, she openly addresses the less glamorous aspects of mania. “It can ruin your entire life, and your family’s life, and those who love you,” Lewis candidly shares.
Yet, amidst the chaos, Lewis credits some of her achievements to the “delusion” her mania instilled in her. She recalls how, as a teenager and a young adult in New York, that intense emotional state motivated her to embrace leadership roles. On a podcast hosted by former First Lady Michelle Obama and comedian Craig Robinson, she reflects, “I became a leader. Captain of the cheerleading squad, president of my class.” Her self-assurance during these manic episodes often led her to skip the anxiety of waiting for casting results, believing she was destined to land a role.
For Lewis, those moments of mania brought an exhilarating sense of power and invincibility. She describes her time in New York during these episodes vividly, explaining how she felt “bigger” than the city itself. Taking friends to the World Trade Center, she would encourage them to gaze at the towering structures and compare her aspirations to their grandeur. “The arrogance, the omnipotence, the delusions of grandeur came with the mania,” she reflects. “You’re unstoppable.”
This feeling of being unstoppable, however, is a double-edged sword. While it drove her to accomplish remarkable feats in her artistic career, it also put her personal life at risk. The struggles she has faced highlight the layers of complexity in bipolar disorder—the vibrant highs often shadowed by profound lows. Lewis’s story serves as a crucial reminder of the importance of mental health awareness, sparking conversations that challenge societal norms surrounding mental illness.
As Jenifer Lewis continues to share her journey, she stands as a beacon of authenticity and resilience in an industry often rife with superficiality. Her openness about her bipolar disorder not only underscores its challenges but also celebrates the unrecognized strength it has contributed to her identity. Numerous individuals are inspired by her ability to showcase both the brilliance and the burden of living with such a condition, redefining what it means to be both an artist and a person living with mental illness.